How can you tell if a drummer is at your door?
The knocking Speeds up.

What's one question you never hear at a blue-grass concert?
Is That the banjo players Porshe

How many guitarists does it take to change a light bulb?
10, 1 to do it and nine to stand around and say how much better they could have done it!

How many drummers does it take it change a light bulb?
5, 1 to do it and the other four stand around saying how much better Neil Peart could have done it!

Do you know how to get a drummer to start playing?
Start Tuning your guitar.

Do you know how to get a bass player to play softer?
Put a piece of sheet music in front of him.

What's the definition of perfect pitch?
When you throw an accordion into a dumpster and it lands on an accordion!

Relative minor..........a guitarists girlfriend!

Two tuba players are walking past a bar...............what?, it could happen!

How many female singers does it take to sing " Crazy "?
Apparently all of them!

What do you do when a musician knocks on your door?
Give him the money and take the pizza!

How many bass players does it take to change a lightbulb?
one,  but the guitarist has to show him how to do it.

How can you tell the difference between all banjo songs?
By their names!

How can you tell if a drum solo is really bad?
the Bass player notices!

How can a jazz musician make a million dollars playing jazz?
Start with 2 million!

I was walking through the kitchen this morning and I thought I heard the onions singing a Bee Gees Song........but it was just the chives talkin.....


My pet mouse "Elvis" died this morning......he got "caught in a trap"


"Doctor, I cant stop singing Green Green Grass of Home"    Oh says the doctor, " You Have Tom Jones Syndrome  Is that Common?    well " Its Not Unusual"

Add Your Favorite musician Jokes! 

Hello everyone!  I started this page just to have a little fun. There are so many jokes about us, it's funny how true some of them are, add your own to the list , I got it started for ya.

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